Chapter two of #sorrynotsorry

  Reader discretion advised, some juicy details may not be suitable for young readers.


After breaking it off with sociopath I’m going to be honest with you I was running around like a mad women. If there was a party I was there. If you had tequila I was one Tequila two Tequila well, you know the rest it rhymes with door. And you know what I missed being me, it felt so good to be my old self again. I felt like a caged animal getting released back into the wild and boy was it fun. I even had made new friends, it was looking up for me. It was now May and the semester of my first year of college was coming to a close and you know what that means? Summer Vacation! And it also just so happened to be my friend’s 21st birthday. She was having a huge celebration in Ft. Lauderdale. And at the last minute I decided  I was going to go. I rushed home from work and packed a bag with all the necessities. I ransacked my closet throwing clothes everywhere to find the perfect outfit, and I finally did. It was a tight fitting blue dress the made all my curves look just right, and the booty was on point. I told my parents not to worry and that I would be staying in Ft. Lauderdale for the night and I was off. I met my friends at a cute little bar across from the beach and by the time I got there everyone was a few drinks in one of those drinks being a huge fish bowl. Server get me that! Since I was only nineteen at the time I obviously had a fake ID. When the server came over I nervously took my Id out of bag and showed her and without hesitation she asked me, “what would you like to drink?” Best feeling in the world! I ordered a drink and since it was happy hour I kept ordering until the guy next to me started to look a lot more cute then I thought he was.

This is where I introduce you to Mr. nice guy. I had known him for awhile seeing him around every now and then but this was the first time we were at a bar together. We started talking casually making conversation. He told me I looked beautiful. He was good, because that comment had me and he knew it. Mr. nice guy started moving closer and I liked it. Before I knew it I was hammered. We all walked back to the hotel and hung out for a little bit until people started passing out. I went to the girls room to find  the bed I was supposed to be sleeping in was taken by my bestfriend, her boyfriend, and the birthday girl. I tried waking them up, no one would budge. So, unfortunately I made my way to the boys room. When I walked in Mr. nice guy was sitting on the bed, as one kid was passed out into a bowl of popcorn and another was puking off the balcony. This was going to be great. I told Mr. nice guy my predicament and he said I could sleep in his bed. I went into the bathroom to put my pj’s on only to find out I forgot to pack them. I was too busy finding an outfit to wear to the bar I totally forgot about the most important necessity of them all. Well, this was awkward I thought to myself. Everyone was sleeping and I really didn’t know what to do. All I had with me to wear was boy shorts which are basically underwear. This just keeps getting better I thought sarcastically. I walked out of the bathroom and nervously I asked Mr. nice guy if I could borrow a shirt. And I swear to you this kid took the shirt off his back and gave it to me. I couldn’t believe how sweet he was or it could have been he wanted to get laid too. But I’m just going to think he’s just a really nice guy. I climbed into bed and moved all the way to the far side. I barely knew this kid and I was sharing a bed with him can you say awkward! We talked for a little bit and then he asked me if I wanted a massage. Naive should be my middle name because I said sure. It wasn’t long before we started kissing and then the clothes came off and well you know the rest. I had always heard from a lot of people that he had a big one. I guess I was about to find out. There was a bit of a malfunction though, there was no damn condoms in this whole hotel room. With all the people here you would think someone would have a condom. So, I had to wait awkwardly in this room naked under the covers with a sick guy on the balcony and kid passed out in popcorn as my prince charming ran to CVS to get condoms. He finally returned and I just about almost fell asleep but he wasn’t ready to give up that easily. Here goes nothing I thought.  He might have been short but not everything was small on him, and I was surprised. It’s safe to say I was happy with my first hook up since sociopath and I broke up. 10 points for the home team.

The next day I woke up and I turned over and there he was right next to me. So many thoughts rushed through my head. And I had to get out of that room ASAP. God, why am I so awkward. I ran into the kitchen to center my thoughts and that’s when my girlfriend came out and she took one look at me and she already knew. She gave me two Advil’s and took the worst picture of me ever just to have proof of what I actually looked like. Honestly I probably looked a lot better than how I felt.  My make up was all over my face, my hair was a nest of who knows what. But we still had a lot of day to cover starting with breakfast. I honestly don’t know how these people were moving after the night we all had. The hotel we were staying at was so hard to get out of. I swear it was a maze. And all this walking was making my dehydrated, hung over self a little bit nauseous. We probably walked around the whole damn parking garage to get out of the place, and that’s when I felt a little something in my tummy and not a good something. I called out to my friend and I told her I was going to throw up. I was trying to whisper so no one else would hear me especially Mr. nice guy. So, I tried to hold it in but there was no holding this in. I ran between two cars so fast and all you could hear echoing through the parking garage was me puking my brains out. I projectile vomited all over the wall of the parking garage, it was awful, but also extremely funny to all my friends. I felt so gross. All I wanted was a shower and to brush my teeth. But I guess some gum and a sink in the restaurant would have to do. After breakfast I felt a lot better, and I was excited for the rest of the day. Mr. nice guy was by my side all day, he was such a sweet kid. He wasn’t one to hump and dump that’s for sure. This vacation symbolized a lot for me in my life. I finally felt like I was in a good place again and happy. And to honor that I got my first tattoo. **Side note my Jewish father almost died when he found out about this. But this tattoo meant a lot to me. I felt strong again and so I got a heart on my wrist to just remind myself to love myself more than any guy could ever love me. Mr. nice guy and I are still friends to this day but nothing more. Trust me he wanted to be more but that wasn’t going to happen. He will always be a near and dear friend with a really BIG…. heart.

Stay tuned Monday for chapter 3 and where you get to meet mr. Regret. 

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